Perforated Sheet…

July 22, 2010 § 31 Comments

I feel like a perforated sheet
In a notebook of girlfriends you collect
Half ripped out
Half holding on
With scribbled dates
Anniversary pictures
A scrapbook collection of cards I gave you
All dangling to hold on
Our bright colors smudged and faded
And as you add another girlfriend
To your notebook of broken hearts
My edges become looser
As you flip over me
Changing your focus
Revisiting whatever memories
Of whomever feels right
Reliving and discarding our forever
I am left here
Blending into your past
Holding on to what was
On a page that is
Falling out of your heart

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§ 31 Responses to Perforated Sheet…

  • mairmusic says:

    So well written! Your development of the metaphor and use of language is terrific– congrats!
    http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/

  • fiveloaf says:

    very lovely and commendable splash and thank you for your comments too!

  • Curtis says:

    I know that this is another poem about relationships, but you’ve been getting stronger in your writing over the past couple of weeks! I really liked the metaphors that you used in it.

    • My heart smiles big with your insight. A many of my works have been old works that were scattered everywhere. Books, napkins, text messages, two different computers, countless of folders, emails, just everywhere. Everything categorized in New Age is all the work I have written since I bought nube, my book of thoughts. I think the constant writing is allowing me to find myself as a writer. In addition to learning from such great writers as Curtis Bell ❀

  • buttercup600 says:

    Awesome writing…you captured it so very well. ~ Hugs x

  • revbillcook says:

    Wonderfully written. Perfect images. Well done. – Bill

    • As I was unpacking, I found an old 5 Star Mead notebook from high school and as I was reading my first rap (yes at 14 I thought I would be a rapper) I saw a page barely hanging on by its perforated edges. Thus my inspiration. Glad you thought this to be wonderful.

  • amazing πŸ˜€ lovely and interesting, i loved the metaphor you used in this poem, it been a wonderful read ^^~ Thank for sharing and have a nice week ahead~

    • He didn’t really have a notebook but instead a small box of memories he kept from every girlfriend he ever had. Even the mini relationships you have in elementary school that never really count. So now that we are past the stages of reconciliation and have decided to just move on, I am curious if he has added me to that box. Upon finding an old notebook, I combined the two and :poof: the rest is here. Well Wishes for your weekend!!

  • Jamie Dedes says:

    Finely written and well wrought. The cadence and flow are perfect. Apprppriate metaphors. Good job . . . you’ve made a splash with me.

  • Wow, very moving. Sometimes when I stop to consider all the good people I have around me, I’m afraid of one day becoming unwanted and forgotten. This poem connects with those feelings. Great poem!

    • Gally it almost seems impossible to have you ever be forgotten. If you are as bright as you are here, there is not way those good people in your life could go without wanting some gally for themselves. Thank you for finding a connection with my poem.

  • Kavita says:

    Oh my gosh…that was so damn well written! The emotion in the lines were just flowing out of the poem and into my face! I mean, what an analogy!! It was much beyond perfection… truly beautiful poem (albeit sad)! The last 3 lines ripped my heart into shreds…
    I wonder if they’ve made some kind of super glue that’ll help glue on to the pages .. REAL well! But better still, that there was just 1 page… 1 long beautiful page…
    I think you’ve done a marvelous job at touching upon such a tender subject.. and with so much grace…

    • I love with a love that encompasses all the good and all the bad of everything. I cheat not my heart of an experience that should allow me to grow and learn. Isn’t that what life is about? My boat is just love. The love I had with him was strong but not strong enough to stay the last page in his notebook. I have no regrets and I think that to be the most beautiful part of the way things ended.

      Kavita, thank you, Not only for your lengthy comments but for thinking my poem is beyond perfection. :hugs: It humbles me so. If you find out about that superglue let me know, I have an astronaut that I need to be superglued to. ❀

  • sk says:

    nicely written, as if bringing me through the situation! Good metaphor.

  • dancingfreak says:

    my my!!

    that’s poetry!!

    unique , wonderful and heartfelt πŸ™‚

    http://www.dancingfreak.wordpress.com

  • gregbrown says:

    I have to agree with kavita as my reaction was, “wow that’s really good.” wonderful metaphor , great language and imagery.. .

  • soulintention: signed .............bkm says:

    this is an excellent piece, the images of the perforted page..with names and memories…and your memory blending with all the other women…trying to stand out…with the fear of being lost….very well done..thank you so much for your visit and comments….much appreciated….blessings…bkm

  • Good one. I feel for the girl whose page is about to be turned. Great way to capture my attention to the story. This flows into my heart.

  • jincy says:

    its strange but most of the times we have such diary entries… nice work

  • siubhan says:

    this analogy works so well with love’s loss, and especially apt for a writer: to see oneself as a discarded sheet of paper, already half-written, half-crumpled; yet another attempt at finding one’s soul-mate, or even one’s soul…

    quite lovely. thanks so much for sharing.

  • Chloe says:

    I loved this poem – and the final lines really brought home the mesage you convey so well.

    “Holding on to what was
    On a page that is
    Falling out of your heart”

    Wow – great stuff! I look forward to reading more of your work in the future!

    Chloe πŸ˜€

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